Posts Tagged: pregnant

30
May 12

Eating Everything in Sight Has Literally Paid Off.

While she was pregnant, Jessica Simpson ate everything in sight and just got rewarded $4,000,000 for it. Because according to UsMagazine, that’s exactly how much her new partnernship with WeightWatchers is worth as their new spokesperson. Now that’s a real business woman, ladies & gentlemen. Bravo, Jess! Well done.

There has been plenty of speculation that Jessica was shoving as much food as possible down her throat during the pregnancy because she already signed a multi-million dollar deal to lose the post-baby weight.

Is it just me, or does her baby also need to become a spokesperson for the WeightWatchers Babies department?

In an interview with People magazine, she said: “After you have your baby it’s like, ‘Oh my God, what happened to my body?’ This is not me! It would be nice to feel comfortable in a bikini but that’s not my goal. I just want to fit into jeans. It would be nice to feel comfortable in a bikini.”

Word. We also would like to see you in a bikini once again.

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Categories : Other crap
02
Dec 11

REALLY??? Just What the World Needs…Another Kardashian. Kourtney is Pregnant.

Kourtney Kardashian and Scott Douchebag have confirmed they are expecting a second child.

Why are these filthy people allowed to reproduce again??

Even though this is a fake Kris Humphries Twitter account, I really do hope for Kris’ sake that the real Kris Humphries is behind this:

And here is a video from the Discovery channel aka E! of Kourtney giving birth to her first child, Mason. I don’t know about you but I can’t fucking wait for PART TWO!!!!!!!!

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31
Oct 11

Happy Halloween from Jessica Simpson and Her Womb!

Jessica Simpson is going to be a MUMMY? Get it??????? Of course you don’t because Jessica looks more like a deranged patient who escaped from a mental institution than a mummy.

With these pictures posted on her piece of a shit official site, Jessica Simpson decided to put all the recent pregnancy “rumors” to rest.


WHAT THE FUCK?

Remember when Jessica Simpson was un-pregnant and hot?

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28
Aug 11

Beyonce is Having a Destiny’s Child

It’s official. Beyonce is with child.

Beyonce arrived to the VMAs and showed off her baby bump. Congratulations to Bey and Jay. I can’t wait to see what their child looks like because the picture below is going to give me nightmares tonight.

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13
Apr 11

Leave Scarlet Johansson Alone, She’s In The Best Shape of Her Life

Scarlett Johansson’s representative has dismissed rumours the actress is pregnant after she was photographed jogging with Sean Penn looking like Sean’s Pennis might  have knocked her up. Scarlett’s spokesman insists the pictures are “misleading.”

“Scarlett is not pregnant. She’s been training for The Avengers for over four months and is in the best shape of her life.”

“She’s outside running and it’s simply the placement of her shirt that is misleading. I’m sure there are other photos in the series that show and prove that she is not pregnant.”

Well in that case, let’s examine the other photos from the series below:

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Categories : Other crap
18
Mar 11

Ivanka Trump’s Growing Baby Bump

On January 21st, Ivanka announced to the world via Twitter that she was pregnant.

Today, Ivanka launched her footwear line at Macy’s in Herald Square and showed off the future President, real-estate tycoon, entrepreneur, pimp, American business magnate, socialite, author, television personality, casino & hotel owner, unless of course it’s a girl then everything I just said plus with a prettier face and nicer hair.

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Categories : Other crap
26
Jan 11

Penelope Cruz Is A Madre

Another perfect child has been born into this world. Penelope Cruz and Javier Bardem’s offspring is finally amongst us.
The actress gave birth on Tuesday at Cedars-Sinai Medical Center in LA. The baby was apparently born on the same day father Javier Bardem received a Best Actor Academy Award nomination for his role in Biutiful, so it’s safe to predict the baby will be an Oscar winning actor. Now that we have resolved the baby’s occupation, I really hope someone brought Penelope this cake during labor:

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Categories : Famous Couples


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