Posts Tagged: ryan reynolds

02
Aug 11

You Two Just Keep Staring Lovingly into Each Other’s Eyes and Telling Us You Are Just Friends…

Ryan Reynolds took his “old pal” Sandy as his date to walk the red carpet at the premiere of his new movie - The Change Up in LA. I mean, why can’t these two already admit they are doing it? The chemistry from the pictures is obvious. For their own good, I really hope these two are at least Friends with Benefits!

After Reynolds split from his wife Scarlett Johansson back in December, rumors started to swirl he was romancing his The Proposal co-star. But then of course both of them shut down any speculation by proclaiming each other as an “amazing friend.” Come on!
Anyways, let’s pretend these two are imitating art as life and Sandy wakes up to Ryan’s boner every morning:

Let’s also hope that Sandy sees this body on her front porch, when her new baby is taking an afternoon nap, of course:

and then I hope they bump into each other naked on purpose:

I also hope they tell each other they are scared…

and then one of them proposes and says fucking YES and makes lots of sexy babies:

Speaking of Ryan’s latest movie – The Change Up. Last night on Jay Leno, he revealed he is staying away from Atlanta, Georgia after feeling cursed while shooting his new movie there.

“I was pretty convinced early on that Atlanta was trying to kill me. We started the movie, the first day of shooting I got there, and it was 5am. Jason Bateman and I, we have identical trailers… And I get to set and I notice that something in the parking lot is on fire. And I say, ‘That looks a lot like Jason Bateman’s trailer, which looks a lot like my trailer. That’s Bateman’s trailer right?’ And they said, ‘No, no that’s yours.’ So my trailer is engulfed in flames.”

Ryan was given a ridiculous, two-story replacement trailer.

“It was the most ostentatious, gigantic two-story trailer… I felt terrible going in and out of that every day. It just did not suit me at all. So two days later, I get to set, and there’s just water coming out of every hole in this thing. And it flooded, a pipe broke in there.”

He continued, “The following month it just sort of snowballed. My hotel room flooded. My dog got sick. I came down with a slight case of divorce (lol) – and I broke my pinky finger.”

 ”I was begging to get out of Atlanta at that point. No offense to Atlanta, it’s a fantastic place, but it really wants my blood. I would wake up each morning and have a safety meeting with myself. And, by the end, I’m just about to get out of there and of course a freak ice storm hits and freezes it solid. I would have moon walked home, had they let me.” 

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Categories : Famous Couples , Other crap
19
Jan 11

You Mean to Tell Me There is None of This???

Sandra Bullock dismissed rumors that she and Ryan Reynolds are comforting/humping each other as recent divorcees when she spoke to Al Rocker at the Golden Globes. Sandra insisted that Ryan is not her “lovah” but merely “an amazing friend” she’s had for 10 years.

“I think there will be a collective sigh amongst women across the United States when I say he’s not my ‘lovah.’ He’s just an amazing friend for 10 years…but I don’t get his loving after dark.”

Sandra also said she is not planning to take Ryan off the market and  that her son Louis is the only man in her life who is off the market until he turns 18.

I don’t know…I really hope these two are doing each other so I will still file this under “Offspring Request.”

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Categories : Offspring Request
27
Dec 10

Natalie Portman Knocked Up and Engaged

Ok bitches, so I went the extra mile and morphed Natalie Portman’s and her baby-daddy, Benjamin Millepeid’s faces to show you what their offspring may look like.

Natalie Portman confirmed that she’s pregnant and engaged to her ballet choreographer from Black Swan, Benjamin Millepied. I mean after all the lesbian sex Natalie has been having on the set and off the set (in our dreams) of Black Swan, the last thing we’d all expect to hear is that she is with child, but apparently she’s been banging her choreographer on the side. Well, yay for this good-looking couple and I hope they don’t pull a Scarlett Johansson and Ryan Reynolds on us after 2 years.

 

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14
Dec 10

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO =*(

Somewhere I once read that “Celebrity Splits Come in Threes” and I said, “I’ll believe it when I see it.” Well now I’ve seen it and I believe it.

First it was Zac Efron and Vanessa, followed by Dexter and his wife and now it’s Scarlett Johansson and Ryan Reynolds, as reported by TMZ. Apparently, the CILF (Couple I’d like to F*ck) just released the following statement:

“After long and careful consideration on both our parts, we’ve decided to end our marriage. We entered our relationship with love and it’s with love and kindness we leave it. While privacy isn’t expected, it’s certainly appreciated.”

This is bullshit. You see this is what happens when People magazine names Ryan “Sexiest Man Alive” and GQ names Scarlett “Babe of the Year.” Two sexy babes don’t make a sexy baby! My Offspring Request has been Denied, thanks People & GQ.

On the bright side, Ryan Reynolds and Zac Efron are now single, don’t care much for the Dexter guy but I’m sure there will be plenty of takers.

Here’s a lil vid of Scarlett being kissed by Sandra Bullock to cheer ourselves up with from these sad news:

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moet tribute to cinema 6 240309
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19
Nov 10

Someone come wipe the drool off my desk

People magazine is known for inventing its yearly special issues naming “Most Beautiful People,” “The Best Dressed” and my personal favorite “Sexiest Man Alive.”
It all started with Mel Gibson in 1985 when he was named the Sexiest Man Alive. Since then, he has obviously obtained a new title – “Luckiest Jew-hater Alive.”

Mel was followed by Mark Harmon, Harry Hamlin, John F. Kennedy, Sean Connery, Tom Cruise, Patrick Swayze, Nick Nolte, Richard Gere, Brad Pitt, Denzel Washington, George Clooney, Harriwson Ford, Richard Gere (again), Brad Pitt (again), Peirce Brosnan, Ben Affleck, Johnny Depp, Jude Law, Matthew McConaughey, George Clooney (again), Matt Damon, Hugh Jackson and ending with Johnny Depp (again) in 2009. To see all the covers of these guys, click here.

This year’s hotties include my top 5 favorite men I often like to think of during sex:

Maksim Chmerkovskiy from Dancing with the Stars, Joe Manganielle from True Blood, Kellan Lutz from Twilight, Rapper Drake, and Vin Diesel.

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Categories : Magazine Covers
18
Nov 10

George Clooney likes Ryan Reynolds as Sexiest Man Alive

George Clooney is thrilled that it was Ryan Reynolds who’s been given the title of “Sexiest Man Alive” by People magazine this year, and not Brad Pitt.

George and Brad are good friends and often poke fun at on one another during interviews about who got better roles and who is better looking.

People magazine named Brad “Sexiest Man Alive” in 1995. George stole that crown in 1997 but then Brad got it back in 2000, only for it to be stolen once again by George in 2006. Well this year, neither one of them got this title so they can both be happy that it went to Scarlett’s humping partner, Ryan Reynolds.

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15
Nov 10

GQ names Scarlett Johansson “Babe of the Year”

My first reaction to seeing this photo of Scarlett Johansson was:

“Damn, this is what gets to hump on Ryan Reynolds.”

But then, I thought:

“Damn, this is what Ryan Reynolds gets to hump on!”

I’d like to hump on both of them. For more pictures of Scarlett to drool or do whatever over, pick up the 15th Annual GQ Men of the Year Issue, on newsstands November 23.

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